Goal Setting and Married At First Sight

Since it’s January and this is the time of year that people are thinking about achieving goals and setting resolutions, I wanted to reflect on a few of the milestones I’ve reached. I think it’s good to do that every so often. Right now I am in the middle of a new endeavor, getting my material ready to publish. I’m excited about this goal, but it’s also daunting. Hopefully, reflecting on some successes will give me a bit more confidence about reaching it.

First, I realized after having my first child that I wanted to be at home. I know not everyone feels this way. I never thought I would feel this way. It took me a while to come to terms with it and even realize that that’s what I needed. It wasn’t an easy thing to achieve, but with a little determination and planning, we made it happen. I look back to the time when we first considered the idea and can hardly believe it was such a stressful topic of discussion. I was so afraid to make the change, even when I knew I wanted it. It just goes to show, you have to take risks. Some of those risks will be the best things you ever did.

Next came the first attempt at writing my first novel. No, that’s not a typo. There was a first attempt. I had the idea for The Blue Jay ruminating for a few weeks and then started to write. I got a whole 5K into it when my computer froze. Even though I had saved the file, it was somehow destroyed, coming back only as random wingdings. That night I thought the universe was telling me to give up. That I must not be meant to write. This is a sign, I thought as I cried into my pillow. I was devastated. 5K may not sound like a lot, but it was for me at the time. The next morning, after the shock had worn off, I decided to push through. This was a story I wanted to tell. Later, when I hit 5K again, I sighed in relief. If I could write 5K twice, then I could write 10K. I could write a novel. That setback, while initially causing me to doubt it all, ended up showing me what I actually had in me.

I think that’s the key to setting goals. You have to go for it, even when you’re afraid, and you can’t give up. You just have to keep going. It’s the tough roadblocks we hit on the journey that make it worth it in the end.

So, to change the subject completely, I just started watching the second season of Married at First Sight. The premise of the show follows three couples who get married…and meet at the altar. That’s right. Arranged marriages.

You’d think the show would be completely trashy and a recipe for crazy fighting and drama. There is some fighting. And some drama. But, all in all the show leaves you hopeful. It’s actually a really interesting study on marriage.

The first season was upbeat. It was real. It left you cheering the couples on (unlike other shows where you’re waiting for the train wreck…) and that felt good. There’s only been one episode of the second season, but I find myself hoping that the cast maintains that optimism and doesn’t become affected by the success of the show, which seems to happen most of the time with reality stars.

Has anyone else seen this show? What are your thoughts?

Update: It was not the second season of the show that I was watching when I wrote this blog post. It was the first season of Married at First Sight: The First Year, which took a look at the couples from season 1 and how their lives were progressing. I didn’t realize at the time the title change. I have since become less invested in the show after finding out how quickly they paired the ill-matched men and women in the second season (all of whom I’ve read are no longer together). Although I know this is a crazy premise AND reality TV, which is usually crap, I really felt the first season’s couples were legitimate. Anyway, I don’t know if I will watch again as it doesn’t seem anyone is in it for (as reality contestants love to say) “the right reasons.” Too bad as I found it super interesting and awesome to root for people instead of watching individuals pitted against each other like in so many other drama-filled shows. :/


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